Twenty Three (Trying to Find a Balance)

Working out feels so good. I am at least 30% happier since I got back on the grind, and while there's a while to go until I feel in the swing of things again, this is a positive sign. While the last month of bodily neglect paid off for my artwork, it has not done much good for myself esteem.

Also I may have a broken throwing finger. It is making it really hard to throw accurately, and it hurts a reasonable amount which is just as well because it is telling me to stop doing stuff with it until I get it checked out.

Frustrating but so it goes. This month is hectic and since I can't make ultimate my number one priority I have to compensate in small ways.

Small ways:
Hydrate more! More water more.
Throw and catch more! Everyday. Lefty, I guess. Euugh.

Getting my train on track, getting my ducks in a row.
Onward into the future.

Oh PS while it is hard to throw because of my finger, my form is not helping. It is not consistent because I have caught the lazy bug. Well joke's on you lazy bug, you will be crushed. Balance.

I don't like this blog post. Yeah, balance. Balance is the key. I need to balance my arrogance with my psychosis and figure out what to project to the world. Insecurity or confidence? Does it matter?
Confidence.

Nunchuck Gecko.

Just keep adding until it makes sense.

I know we'll be just fine

Was scrolling through past blog titles and noticed PWE. At first I could not recall what that meant. It only took a second to spark, and of course Emily remembered even quicker, although I'll cite her sobriety's edge and her wonderfully quick brain for whatever repressed aspect of my ego needs to win at everything.

Practice. Winning. Everyday. 

That was my mantra in my last college semester both for ultimate and life. Lately it has been more PDE which is a lot less productive, although we've been making the most out of our last weeks in New Paltz and it has been fun.

Home soon, and it will be a mad dash to organize my life for the summer and beyond. When the dust settles, I will have a life plan and projects to work on in spades, and I need to make sure I adjust my attitude for many reasons, not the least of which being that I need to work more on my ultimate game so I can be a baller contribute to the club team, and also so I start feeling good about myself as an athlete. 

At the very least, my baseline athleticism going into the season is the highest it has ever been, my ultimate  is the highest it has ever been, and the game is making all kinds of sense to me in ways it never did before. But in the midst of all the craziness of my threee weeks at home, if this is going to be a successful season for me, is putting in the hard early work to shake off the rust, finding the motivation to run when it hurts more than normal and that little insecure part of me starts slinging mean words to dampen the fire. 

Have a good Thursday, all.

PS THIS is hilarious, brings back the funny memories from surgery. Never had to deal with anything like a torn mcl or worse though, hope ya'll join me in wishing Brodie a speedy recovery. Ultimate needs him.  

This should not be an issue

In relation to the catching issue is confidence and swagger. Need to be more confident in game, so I don't drop a disc (and so that when I do, it does not adversely effect later play).

Confidence or else.

Humpday

I had some uncharacteristic drops in the scrimmages last saturday. From the ones I remember, all were pancake grabs, and I think the reason is that I used a lot more force than necessary with my top hand, causing the disc to wobble away. Given that they were all really routine, easy catches, I panicked and did not recover the disc when it started to slip.
For that reason, I've been practicing using even force and using a gentle upper hand to make sure that that shit becomes muscle memory. I feel really good about my one handed grabs with both hands, better with right though because I usually carry things in my left hand. Need a backpack.

It is definitely that point in the semester where the usual combination of panic and complacency sends me into a tailspin for a month or so before I recover what can be saved in a flurry of finals week bullshit. Can't do that. Got a workout plan, got a lot of art to do, have to do both every day.

Gunx love, all.

The Perfect Week

Thoughts from today

We need better sideline presence, and a big part of that is teaching everyone what their role is on the sideline.
It comes down to focus, at all times. On a related note, I sometimes lose focus on my defensive roll on the field when trying to help someone else vocally. Got beat deep by Pat because I was too focused on telling another Gunx defender to sprint deep with his man and layout for the block.
Point is, I need to work on focusing on my role at all times and not try to do the sideline's job. And we need our players that tend to lose focus on the sidelines to work on their focus so that we always have that support system. Part of the problem is people post up by their things and will talk to the D while the action is near them, but become less effective when the play is down the field. Getting people to spread out will help.

Still working on adjusting my throwing form. I can generate a lot of power, but I have to adjust my muscle memory so that I always do it.

Today was pretty cool. I had a ton of fun, wouldn't know it if you saw me afterwards though I was in a bit of a funk about losing. Wah.
Practice tomorrow let's go.

Friday, friday, gotta post blogs on Friday

Dang its been a week. I thought I fixed my nocturnal sleep schedule fast, but it crept up on me all bad.
Anyway though, here's some things I've been mulling over this week.

At our last men's practice, I made some bad offensive turnovers due to poor field vision and old thinking. The same occurred at nocturnal - made some crazy throws trying to do everything on the field. The difference is, nocturnal was a hat tournament. My crazy stupid throws got us and lost us points in relatively equal measure, but in the grand scheme of things we were a hat tournament team with no chemistry, playing for ourselves.

It is important to note that the winning team, while having solid 'star power', won because their chemistry and unselfish play allowed them to take advantage of enemies weaknesses without presenting weakness of their own.

Ultimate is a team sport. If I am going to help the team suceed this year, I have to put aside the high risk gunslinger's mantle of yesteryear and embrace a philosophy of humble play and good decisions.
The discipline to dump it when the stall count gets in the 4 - 5 range. The field vision to look off a streaking deep cutter when I don't have an easy throw, or see the poach behind my mark that will destrudo the sick io break flick.

Brian talked to me about my role on the team changing, not having to make crazy throws to make the offense work. I've been preaching playing within oneself for years, now I actually have to learn to do it.

Oh and Dave, you were right about the air bounces. Working on it.

Gunx love all.

The Mask

Heck of Jim Carrey Movies are on tv tonight.

Playing outside in February is so gangster. Despite short notice and wind and a little cold we had a great turnout and tomorrow should be better. If this weather holds outdoor practices with Brian...well, I'm pumped. #DirtBeardWarmFist

Field vision was a little difficult, compounded by everyone's desire to cut everywhere. Rushed a lot of throws, and throwing upwind hucks was difficult. Also threw some stupid bullshit, basically in indoor mode. Playing outside this month will put us in the best position we've ever been in. Stated.

#pushups

I'm learning to push pass

Why not? Its the only throw you can really practice effectively while walking someplace by yourself.

Cons and Pros of today's workout

Cons: did not posses the necessary fortitude to finish snertz by myself. Let the cold sap my motivation. #weakbitchshit

Pros: ran into Will afterwards and got a good half hour of throwing in, tightened up the wind game a bit and worked on his form. Dude is going to be the truth.

Don't fall into the indoor trap of doing it all with your wrist! My first 30 throws were ridiculous because I was either airbouncing backhands or throwing them with wrist only. Forehands were alright, but backhands improved a lot more.

Basically, need to get a group together that can throw and workout outside. I can do that five days a week if I really want it.

Aiiiiiight

radio edit: when I am attacking the disc, if I think about how high it is I give up on it much easier. I can jump a lot higher than I think I can. #mentalgamewtf, #COURAGIO #hastags #manupnextime

Post deleted blues

Done been struggling with a weighty blog post for some time and I finally wrote it. Then it got deleted because I was signed into the wrong gmail account and an error done did follow that.

Dang yo.

Anyway though, the point is that I had a moment of personal catharsis last Sunday, triggered by running penance sprints with Tom (Tom and I together should win on offense) until my gorge rose. The gallon of water exploded out of my mouth and nose into the bathroom garbage can was an excellent physical counterpoint to a significant chance in how I view what is important in life and what kind of man I want to be.

Having written it already, I feel the weight of inability to express lift off my chest, and even better, don't need to bore all ya'll with the rest of it. However Ya'll know I love talking. Talk to me. Life is amazing.

At practice I also learned some important stuff, quite a bit about dictating physically on d (I'ma be rocked up by sectionals so using that body is a must) and also that whenever I throw I stand and watch it fly instead of immediately making my next move. That is whack!

The counter point to the latter point is that when marking, as soon as your mark throws, put your body in his way before he starts moving. Dictate where he can go. I knew that one already but I never do it enough.

Anyway, Gunx love all.

Coalition Victory

Today I am overwhelmed with the beauty of life, the sadness, the struggle, the majesty.

The grand spectacle.

We are a part of something that is massive and amazing.

It is paramount that we do something with it, use all of our myriad abilities and faculties and gifts.

I could go on. It is wizard times.

In ultimate terms, to accomplish our goals this year we have to change the team culture to one of work ethic and mutual support. The main challenge, now that we have Brian to steer the ship, is to get everyone to buy in on an individual level.

That's the captains' job. Okay.

We can go to regionals this year. We have the tools, we need to put them together in the right order.

"you can build a perfect machine out of imperfect parts"

Shiny Times

This time of the semester is so bright and wonderful, when expectations are high, goals are set and pressure is low. A few weeks in it tends to fall apart, analogous to playing a game of monopoly. A few turns in and your money is gone, your cards are bent and your friends are probably in jail.

My mom came up with that one.

Anyway, things are off to a good start. I feel fit and sassy.

Let's go.

Coming Home

Season almost starting. Wowie zowie. I'm almost happy with my baseline fitness. Running regularly will help. The combine showed me that it will be useful to focus on sport specific motions and running situations to train - plyos, serpentine for cutting, short hard sprints, etc.

Want to get into olympic lifts as well. We get once a week in the weight room.

This semester is it - if I am going to achieve my college frisbee goals, it is now. It would be easy to take a backseat role on the team this semester to focus on my thesis. I could justify it, but I won't because I will never get this chance again.

Go time, now or never.

I've double majored in frisbee for this long, now that I actually have a schedule where I can give my artwork 100% academic attention, it ought to be easier than ever to balance my time to train and play with the team. Why the fuck not.

"I'm just trying to be a better man, damn. I'm just trying to be somebody I can talk to in the morning with a smile."

PS pretty sweet write up of CC tryouts. See if you can spot cap'n David!

http://skydmagazine.com/2012/01/pro-ultimate-lives-ct-constitution-combine/

And a sweet post tryout video of Tim Morrill demoing jump technique, among other things.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JI2Qa2BHqXk

Energy Beans

Connecticut Constitution tryouts lit my goddam fire! Dang I am so pumped.

Walking into the dome was a veritable who's who of NY club and Connecticut college ultimate, with a smattering of good New England players. I'd put myself around the middle of the pack, that might be self aggrandizement but I'm surely guilty of worse.

The tryouts were split into 12 small groups (6 0r 7 each), each group having a pair group that it did most of the exercises with. My group started out playing a half hour of mini (each activity had a 15 minute time slot) so we were in on the action right away.

That was followed by the 40 yard dash, vertical jump measuring and a throwing drill (throwing breakmark passes to in cuts from a vert stack, with some sprinting similar to big dick).

After a short break, new stations were created for group discussions, a 300 yard shuttle run (that hurt - not up on my cardio), a big dick variant (hella fun) and serpentine.

The tryout was tremendous motivation and fun. Met some of my personal heroes in the game, and wasn't even too awkward about it.

What helped it be a positive experience was my resolution going into the tryout to play it casual - I was not invested in the result, only the experience. That helped me to play confidently.

It also gave some insight into the thought process and plans of the people running some of the audl teams. Talking with the owners of the Connecticut and Rhode Island teams made it clear that they are professional, focused and willing to work with the established ultimate community to create a new and important stage of the game's development. I really hope they are successful. Let's go to a game, all.

Meant to finish this post last night, but the energy bean crash was too much. Heck of sore today, hiked in the woods for a while which helped a bit.

I got cut, fair enough. Was hoping to make it to the next phase so I'd get another chance to mix it up, but my stats are just not good enough. Great motivation to become a better athlete - my throws and gameplay were pretty strong but my athletic stats were not even close. I saw Hus jump 43" - holy crap.

ENERGY BEANS

Holes

Planned to start air alert yesterday, that did not work out due to the septic tank exploding and having to dig giant holes in the yard. Kind of a throwback to my early aspirations of paleontology.

Started today instead with the double up tomorrow. Boy was the first day less rough than it was last year. Not sure what my goal is for air alert, not as interested in completing it as I was last year but will definitely use it was a supplemental work out for at least the first five weeks of the season, maybe longer. We'll see how that goes.

Throwing is fun.

January Wedding

Yeah so, after killing my best ever performance on eight minute abs, I might want to do more for my obliques since they are integral for the torque of throwing big passes. This is cool : http://www.youtube.com/user/passion4profession#p/u/31/-vVOfsdwqaY

Grapefruits

Grapefruits are juicy and delicious. They are the perfect size so that you feel just a little full after eating one. As a bonus, the juice helps you find every tiny cut on your hand, in case you want to connect them to make a picture.

Slowly but surely I am getting my spring season fire. To succeed as a player and captain this semester, my LAST semester, I will have to concentrate on:

Goal setting

Mental focus

Practice (Winning) Everyday

There are no more grapefruits left in my house.

Goal writing time.