Gymbeard Bikebutt

Before we begin, here is a handy feature I have devised for the reader on the go. If you are too busy to keep up with my erratic but clearly relevant update schedule, just bookmark this page and read the following paragraph every day on your way to work. It is a boilerplate that is interchangeable with any given update in the coming weeks. That way you can keep up with me without adding undue tedium to your busy commute through the mortal plane.

"Dear diary blog. It was a dark and dreadsome day at work until I got home and preformed a workout activity. Working out yet again proves to be the valium for the mortal acrophobe that is me navigating the massive roller-coaster of seasonal and work related depression. I made moderate gains, and am looking forward to when the season is yet again favorable to compete in flying disc sports. Related statistics. Esoteric quip. Tangentially related video."

Won't that simplify things? Now back to the action.

Today I totally kicked butt at spin class. I felt like such a poop on the way to the gym and nearly called in sick. To myself. That's weird, right? Anyway, I somehow got to the gym and it turns out taking a few days off payed off. I felt great and it was the first spin where I was able to complete every standing climb. I only felt like I half assed one 45 second race, which is a lot better than last week where I plateaued fairly early and did not push myself much in the last third of the class either time.

Gains! Progress! Depression laid waste for another evening!
Seeya.

YowieOoo

I just learned how to properly do reverse crunches and they hurt so good.

Buying my home gym tonight. Having a job is a lot cooler than I always imagined!

Lost Song

Second spin class went well, improved my form and breathing techniques and paced myself a little better. I still wanted it to be over the entire time, but two major improvements were a)knowing more or less how long it was and how much more there was (it is easier for me to push harder when I have a clearly achievable end goal) and the small moments of triumph that occurred when my better form allowed me to push harder.

I was able to standing climb a lot more and for longer, but still had to stop early about half the time, more towards middle. In the beginning I had more energy and in the end I had more drive. Plenty of room for improvement but better than the first time. Great cardio.

Given my current work schedule, three spin classes a week is a little over the top so I am going to stick to two for now. Still training six days a week, keeping that up as long as possible. Training a lot makes rest days seem amazing and hard won. Working a lot makes days off seem precious and golden. This ain't college but I'm starting to like it.

Confronting seasonal depression helped.

I dunno what else to blog about. Working out is it. Yeahhh.

PS this is kind of a cool variation of big dick. Don't like a low to the ground target but still cool. Maybe have the target be a person?
I miss throwing. I miss being outside, and nice spring days where you play all day in the warm mud. Ahhh this season is going to be awesome though, and I am working to earn that now and in the coming months and that feels good.

Workout Review: Spin Class

It is MLK's birthday and also my dad's. Both are inspiring to me, the latter kicked my ass at cycling today.

New goal: spin three times a week for the next month, get cardio up and build a muscular baseline for phase II.

The world is full of sadness, violence, senseless hatred. Working out makes that go away for a while.    Lately, not much does it for me, working out is saving my psyche.

I leave you with this.
Boom.

Pattern Interrupt

I had stuff to write about for today but then I had my mind blown by 8 min abs level II. Somehow I've been doing that workout for years but never advanced to the next level (a fair metaphor for my ultimate fitness, but anyway). It is very different and that was jarring. Only could not finish one exercise though, so I will do it again in two days.

Ran my longest run of the year (awesome), and had my first throwing session of the year (really??).
It is amazing how working out can cure depression. New goal work out twice a day for maximum peace of mind. That would be super sick.

Talking to myself on the blogophone

The trend this week is I get home, watch a movie and talk myself into taking an off day, and then snap and work out hard. Go with what works I guess.

Building motivation one little cat step at a time (there are no babies in my house). However, I have not figured out a way to motivate myself to run outside. I want to go every day but not enough to actually do it most days - it is a choice of getting up wicked early and going before work, or going after work at seven or eight in the dark and cold. The former option is a lot safer, but it is going to take the biggest adjustment yet.

While that is a major question mark style work in progress, the upside is that despite the lack of motivation when I get home from work, I spend all day at work looking forward to working out. Progress.

Self Obsession, Self Creation, etc etc

Getting back into shape has come with constant reminders of how much my physical fitness has become tied to my sense of self, and my confidence. I aspire to be a fairly zen, smooth guy, you know? Just one of those guys that gets it done. But I'm not really there yet, or else I would be a lot less bothered by the now and just trust in the process of getting back into shape, trust that repeated action and discipline will provide the desired results and in the meantime, just be cool.

But I don't trust the process, because without ultimate I am kind of lost, fitness wise. It is really hard for me to train seriously when I can't play ultimate regularly. But I have, finally, begun the process of shedding the off season rust and getting back in the swing of things, and so it was that I found myself at the gym today wondering exactly what I was doing. 

I'm not good in the gym by myself. I revert a little bit to the scrawny high school freshmen afraid of all the big scary guys, afraid to do the wrong thing. After a warmup run I feel a little better, but I don't like the dull grind of treadmills and stationary bikes. Running without a disc involved or a destination in mind is not palatable.  

Sure does beat not running though. 

And that thought process started a chain reaction of small scale epiphanies. There was a time where I just loved ultimate so much that it was an all consuming obsession. It was more or less all I thought about, all I wanted to do, all I did. That changed, gradually, in college. Ultimate became foremost a responsibility, and my passion was dampened by consistently failing to reach my personal goals, let alone the expectations of others.  I managed to take the game both too seriously and not seriously enough, and that kind of ruined it for a while. 

Now though, I'm trying to be an adult, to get my career off the ground while slogging through the minutiae of low paying jobs, trying to move out of my parents' house, etc etc. And I'm finding that I need ultimate in my life, the kind of joyful physical celebration sort of ultimate that makes real life go away for a while. And I need the energy that being in really good shape provides, so that I can get home from a ten hour workday and still have the fire to draw pictures and preform logistical tasks. 

I can't try and Ken Dobyns my ultimate career anymore. I can't make it my number one priority. My career is more important. But I want to play, as much as I can. And I want to have fun every time I step on the field. If I can change my mentality and attitudes about the game, I suspect I will become a better player and have a much healthier field demeanor. I don't like who I am in ultimate, but I will. Ultimate needs to be my escape, never something to escape from. Its fun.  

So in the absence of a clear-cut ultimate goal (next season being far away and fraught with uncertainty) I have come up with a few general purpose, somewhat arbitrary fitness goals, some targets to shoot at. Why not. I need to be fit. If nothing else, nocturnal is coming up. If nothing else, not being fit sucks so bad. 

I want to be able to: 

Do 100 pushups. 

Do sets of 12 pullups. 

Pull 100 yards. 

Forehand huck 80 yards. 

Weigh under two hundred 

Run a five minute mile, why not, I hate distance running for its own sake but it would be cool to run a five minute mile

Win Nocturnal 

Train six days a week (running, throwing, and upper or lower body)

It takes a lot of writing and thinking to get myself on the right path. I probably would not have made it as a caveman, who ever heard of a neurotic anxiety ridden caveman? Nobody, because they did not have the internet to tell us about it. But nobody quite at ease ever went down into a cave to scrawl on the walls in blood and dirt. 

I like 2013 so far. Keep it rolling. 

Hobbit Review (SPOILERS)

Hobbit Review (SPOILERS)

In my highly informed opinion, the best CGI that has ever been done. Gollum looked unreal, and by that I mean he looked extremely real.

Deviated from the book in ways that interrupt the narrative flow somewhat, and there are a lot of small changes that will bother power nerds. I was okay with most of them. Did not entirely like the Rivendell scene, and a lot of the added fight scenes bordered on Watchmen - like ridiculousness. Its a fine line though, and for the most part they were entertaining and not annoyingly gratuitous.

This movie on its own works best for people with a reasonable familiarity with Tolkien's writing - you need a passing knowledge of the Return of the King appendices and the Unfinished Tales. For those who know the entire canon and cosmology, the narrative is a little diced up and there are a lot of small changes that will be bothersome (Azog is a dead goblin, Gollum has six teeth (c'mon I mean really) etc etc). For those who have only seen Lord of the Rings or are even more unfamiliar with the mythology, the movie is likewise problematic (what the hell is going on, where's Legolas, etc etc).

For the latter group, the movie should improve depending on the strength of the next two. I suspect they will be fantastic. The seige of Dol Guldor is going to be so sick, and meeting Benedict Cumberbatch under the mountain should be absolutely epic.

All in all it is a good start to the Hobbit trilogy. Can't state enough how amazing the cgi was. The landscapes are sweeping and magnificent, with Jackson and company's typical attention to detail. Going to see it in imax next if possible.

Okay that's enough movie reviewing its bedtime dontchaknow.

Bridget Jones' Dairy Farm

Twenty thirteen, here it is. Rang in the first day of the new year with the manic energy and strange thought patterns typical of a heavy but not terrible hangover. Got a lot of work done! Drank my last soda for a while cause ITS TRAINING TIME BABY WHOO.

Sorry got a little worked up just then.

Basic Benjamin Stats:
(for the beginning of the year, need a reference point. This is our raw material.)

Weight: 223
Anxiety Level: Moderate
Heart: Warm Fuzzies. Humanity is beautiful if a little scary sometimes.
Websites launched: None.
Cardio Fitness: Like a shetland pony with a sloth's ambition
Throws: Who knows? Forehand blades with boots on look good.
Days since last drunk: 0.6
Toothbrush: lost (gross)
Drunk pushup max: 29.5


So there you have it. Obviously a lot of room for improvement, but probably better than my baseline fitness in other seasons.
Probably.

Low fitness is troubling but career wise I have clear goals in mind and clear steps to take to start moving toward them. Also the Hobbit was really good.

See you next week, blog readers!